The NBA is full of colorful characters, but none of them are quite so outlandish as Russell Westbrook. This all-star point guard is known for his pregame outfits that have such a wide range of absurdity that it is hard to capture in just one article.
However, just because these outfits are absurd does not mean they are not useful or even prognosticative. Believe it or not, there is often a direct correlation to Westbrook’s pregame wardrobe choice and the results of the Oklahoma City Thunder’s basketball game later that day.
In order to learn more about these correlations, let’s take a look at some of the most ridiculous displays of clothing that Westbrook has to offer and what they might mean. We do not guarantee that these outfit conclusions will always help you to win your bets, but the only way to know how effective they are for sure is to try them out.
One of the most common outfits that Westbrook will wear before a game is a nerd outfit. You might think that he does this to look smart, but he really only dresses like this when he knows he is about to get a triple-double.
Westbrook has more triple-doubles when he wears these nerdy clothes than any other time. An extra bonus is when he wears a clip-on tie, which means you know he is not putting up with any nonsense that day. If you manage to catch him on one of those rare nights when he has a pocket protector on, you might as well bet the house on the Thunder to win that night. If he does not perform as expected on these nerdy nights, you will easily be able to give him a wedgie at his locker after the game and demand that he hands over his lunch money.
The second most common type of outfit that Westbrook likes to sport before a game is the rock star outfit. This will usually involve a shirt featuring one of his favorite bands and a pair of ripped jeans to eliminate any chance of looking even remotely respectable.
Usually, the only time when Russell wears these rock star outfits is when he is distracted by thoughts about things that are not related basketball, such as cupcakes. The amount of attention he gets while wearing these ridiculous ensembles keeps him from getting his head in the game, and he is almost never in the zone on these nights. We recommend avoiding any bets on the Thunder when Russell is in rock star mode.
One of the most common accessories you will see Russell sporting is known as a man purse. It’s kind of like a man bun, except even more annoying. What does this questionable little bundle of leather mean in the grand scheme of things?
After a ton of painstaking research, we have found that Westbrook only brings these silly little bags on gameday when he forgot to brush his teeth that morning. Why did he forget to brush his teeth? Well, his mind was so focused on the game coming up that day that it slipped his mind. For this reason, we recommend betting on the Thunder’s success whenever he has a man purse, as Westbrook usually flosses his skills in these games.
Occasionally, Westbrook will wear an outfit that makes it appear he has time traveled from a distant future. This would explain why he wears so many ridiculous outfits, since he knows he can always go back and change what he wore. Apparently, man purses are still a thing in the future, which is rather disappointing.
If there is one thing we have learned in our time on planet Earth, it is that you should never question a man from the future. Anytime you catch Westbrook with an outfit like this, he most likely already knows what is going to happen on every play, and you should not bother to bet against the Thunder on these occasions.
Does this look like a dangerous man to you? If you answered yes, then you were extremely correct. Nobody wears granny pajamas if they do not plan on dominating their competition, and Russell is no exception to this rule.
Nothing completes the success of this outfit better than matching pink pajama bottoms and thick bifocals. Without these, the whole outfit becomes a lame attempt at impersonating a 98-year-old woman. Russell is aware of this, which is why it is a great idea to bet on the Thunder to win their game whenever he busts out this flashy pink ensemble.
We will give him the benefit of the doubt this time and assume that that is a camera bag instead of a man purse. Nevertheless, Russell Camerabrook is a force to be reckoned with in the basketball world since he always appears to have a picture-perfect game.
It is obvious that he started out this day with the plan of being Russell Rockbrook with the ripped jeans. At some point, something went terribly wrong, and he decided that a big orange photographer sign for a shirt would gain even more attention than a ripped Slayer shirt. This is a bold strategy, but as long as he keeps an eye out for Dennis Rodman, he shouldn’t have any troubles.
Any man that needs this much attention on any given day knows for a fact that he is about to posterize any fool that tries to get in his way. Anytime I see this man wearing a giant orange sign for a shirt I know that things are about to get serious, and that I should be betting on the Thunder to win that evening.
Somebody cue the Rocky music. This man is ready to grind from nothing to the top of the world…again. He may have millions of dollars now, but that is not going to stop him from wearing a shirt that he found in an Oklahoma dumpster.
Anytime Russ appears like he is ready to grind from the bottom, you know it’s time to lay some wagers on Oklahoma City to win the game. He even leaves his man purse at home on these occasions, which guarantees he will be fully focused and ready to rumble.
Russell Westbrook’s wardrobe might be outlandish, but it is not as outlandish as the amount of money that is waiting to be made by using these outfits as a betting guide. Whether he is in granny pajamas or a rock star getup, there is plenty of information to be ascertained that can lead you on the path to glory.